Why Eminem's Lyrics Perfectly Describe My Blood Donation Experience

This past Saturday I made a decision, one that I've been thinking about for years. I was going to donate blood. The past several times I tried, I was turned down. I had been to Europe back to back years in high school and then Belize - which meant I had to wait a few years until I was eligible. Then it slipped my mind for a few years until my mom underwent a massive surgery - again, I wasn't able to. About a month or so ago a blood drive came to my office, I thought I would finally be able to go for it! But, I had been sick that week on antibiotics and was turned away.

This past week my mom opened the paper and read that there was a national blood shortage and the blood drive was in need of donors. She made the suggestion that I was healthy, I hadn't left the country and now would be a good time - so we drove to the Mundelein Fire Department, hesitant to roll up my sleeve, but I FINALLY did it!

And in case you read about my interview in the paper.... let me give you a better quote than the one I gave the journalist. 

I wanted to help in a way that was different than the 2 mission trips I've been on, the countless community service projects I've helped plan or the times that I've spent volunteering with multiple organizations. I wanted to help save lives the best way I knew how, similar to how someone saved one of my own family member's life.

I was scared. I hate needles. And blood. When all three of those things are in the mix, let's just say, I'm not the most articulate. So, as the reporter was taking photos of me with a needle in my arm, I was less than my photogenic self (aka no leaning here).

When she asked, "what advice would you give a first time blood donor?" All I could utter was, "bring your mom." Right as the words left my mouth, I knew I could have taken that moment, used the platform given to me, to potentially make someone else change their mind about donating. But, I didn't. I didn't seize the moment, the opportunity or even Eminem's advice in Lose Yourself when he sings, 

"Look, if you had one shot [ I literally had one shot], or one opportunity

To seize everything you ever wanted [to share why donating blood is important]. one moment

Would you capture it or just let it slip?

YO

His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy ...

He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready"

I totally let it slip, sorry EM. 

In February of 2014 I attended a business expo in Jacksonville, Illinois. This photo is what I was told my blood type is: 

According to the American Red Cross, O+ donors' red cells could potentially be transfused to anyone who has a positive blood type (that's 85 percent of the population).

This information, the need for donors and my own family member who needed a blood transfusion, were all factors calling me to action.

As I was giving blood, a former high school teacher was there as well, the Mundelein Fire Chief and community members I never met were all cheering for me. It was feeling I can't explain, but giving back in a way that can save a life is one everyone should experience. 

Check out this link to find out where you can find the next blood drive. 

All in all, the bruise will fade and I'm so glad I was finally able to participate! 

Oh how my life plans have changed

As I'm sitting here at 11:30 at night I can only think of a few things, none of which were on my mind six months ago, let alone nine months ago when I graduated from college. As a wide-eyed soon to be college graduate I was more than excited to finish my senior year with a bang and move onto bigger and better things. I always knew that moment would come when my name would be called and I would walk across that stage, accept my college diploma and get a "big kid job" (after all that IS why I went to college, right?!) It wasn't that simple and it still isn't. I can remember it like it was yesterday, I was sitting in the hallway of my dorm a few weeks before graduation talking to my roommate - then all of a sudden it hit me like a brick from the ceiling.. I was about to graduate college and had NO idea of what I was going to do next. I started freaking out. It happened slowly, I started to panic, the walls started closing in and I felt like I couldn't breathe. For a second,I laughed about it, but then I started crying. And I don't mean crying like I did when I realized the Golden Girls ended after season seven, I mean bawling like a child who didn't get an ice cream cone in Disney World on the hottest day in August. My roommate tried to calm me down, but then it got worse. My neighbors all of a sudden started appearing from no where and before I knew it, I was surrounded by some of my dearest friends. They all sat down with me and poured their support, expressing that I was going to be alright and that everything would play out as it should. Looking back on this moment I'm incredibly grateful, but I also find it funny. It's funny how I was so scared of the future, finding a job and thinking about where I would end up after I graduated. It's funny how at that moment, the walls were closing in, the ceiling was falling and my life seemed like it was over before I even knew it started. My goals were to simply graduate and just take a lot of photos. Now, it's been nine months and not much has changed besides my goals (and maybe the fact that I'm living with my parents).

Here is a small run down of how things have changed:

1. I want less than 50 emails in all four email accounts I use
       I'm down to 7,510 emails from over 10,000 in one account.. I have a LONG ways to go

2. I want to wake up not being tired
       I used to be able to stay up until 2 AM every night, wake up at 9 AM and be ready to take over
       the world. Now, I can barely stay up until 11 (tonight is unusual)

3. I was always game for any social function, party, get-together or outing (alcohol or not) - now        I'm just interest in if there will be snacks

4.  Golden Girls & I Love Lucy were on a constant repeat - Now, I brush my teeth, put on make             up and get dressed to watching CNN

5. I used to think my parents were incredibly boring. They went to work, came home, made dinner then watched the news - and now, I'm not much better...

6. A filter was not really something I had - now I bite my tongue more than I actually speak

As I write this, my boyfriend asked, "what is the next step in your life, where do you want to go from here?" This question made me stop in my tracks and really think of how to answer. Where do I want to be? Where am I going? And to be completely honest, I'm no where near the end. I have a better idea of where I'm going than I did the night I was crying in the middle of my dorm hallway. There's a better grasp on what I want, but I'm not there yet. When I think about it, it would be unfair to say exactly what I want or where I'm going, because that road hasn't been discovered. I'm not sure where I'm going, but I'm excited for the ride ahead and I promise to tweet about it.

xoxo

My Trip to The North Pole

This weekend I got to be an elf as we traveled to the North Pole to pick up Santa! I lead songs on the Polar Express with all the children (and apperanlty there are WAY more words to Christmas songs than just the chorus - I've clearly been singing the songs wrong my whole life). My elf hat was GINORMOUS, which I wasn't thrilled about, and one parent said that they could see it from the other side of the parking lot... #yay 

 

Hope everyone had a magical and joyful weekend! 🎅🎁🎄🎉

Xoxo

Surreal Moments, Ones That Can't Be Explained

It's been a while. It's been a while since I've posted anything on here. And even longer since I've reflected on where I am in my life or where I'm going. After a long day of work and a much anticipated weekend, I reflected on where I am in my career on my way home. After making a phone call to my mom to discuss our days, she grew silent. We asked each other how our days were, but not much was said. I can't remember the exact dialogue, but I remember her saying that someone has passed away. It's been years since I've experienced loss. Sure, there's been heart ache through medical conditions, surgeries and life changing moments, but it hasn't been death in a long time.

I knew this person briefly, although my parents knew him for more than 25 years. He helped me in launching my career right out of college, gave me room to grow and explore the business world in a way I've never seen it before. We may not have been close, or known each other very well, but his kind actions will always mean so much.

It's interesting how people experience loss and how they express their anger, fear, frustration and anything in-between. My dad knew this man the most, and watching him express his shock is something that I can't explain. No matter what test results indicate, awards received, stories shared or work accomplished, no one can explain why things happen the way they do.

I've heard the word surreal so many times this evening I've almost forgotten it's meaning. When tragedy strikes people come together and they talk. They share stories, memories and feel each other's pain. This happened with my family. We sat down for dinner and talked about how surreal life was, for all of us. Life events were discussed, plans for the weekend were made and the small moments of silence in between our small conversations were moments we each reflected on.

Often we forget to appreciate what's right in front of us. We're so busy keeping up with traffic and cutting each other off on the highway, that we lose track of the precious things. The moments that can't be replaced.

This weekend, I'm going to take my own advice. I'm going to slow down and appreciate the many things I've already been blessed with.

I hope you all do the same.

xoxo

Don't Let Them Have Children #Oh

Maybe it’s how I was raised, or maybe it’s my desire to be independent, or maybe its my lack of willingness to deal with idiotic comments. Yet again, our society is basing individuals’ ability to be parents based on their appearance or in this case, sexual preferences. An article in the New York Times discusses a study saying that same-sex couples ultimately fail as parents, “The study, Dr. Regnerus wrote, “clearly reveals” that children are most apt to succeed when they grow up “with their married mother and father.”

Not only did this comment make me angry, it made me question where these children are. I've encountered plenty of children throughout my lifetime from working at camps and swim teams. I've met some outstanding parents and great kids, but I wouldn't say they are all flawless. EVERYONE has their issue, that’s how life is. If we base our values off of how television shows portray the ideal family, we will forever be stuck in a world of disappointment.

The article continues noting that Dr. Regnerus wrote in a pretrial brief, “it remains prudent for government to continue to recognize marriage as a union of a man and a woman, thereby promoting what is known to be an ideal environment for raising children.” 

Excuse me while I provide you some examples of “quality parenting” of heterosexual individuals.

1. A mother is accused of leaving her two children in a cold car while she got her makeup done at a mall in Charles County.

2. 8 Monstrous Mothers Who Killed Their Own Children.

And if the stories aren’t enough, enjoy the photos.

Wendy D. Manning, a professor of sociology at Bowling Green State University in Ohio notes: “only about half the children in the United States live with married, biological parents.” The article also mentions, “Children of single mothers, adopted children, children of divorce and children in poverty all have worse outcomes on average than children in stable middle-class marriages.” That’s shocking; I thought ALL children from heterosexual parents were perfect?

Regardless of the sexual orientation of the individuals raising a child it’s understandable that a child may lack the characteristics of a male or female figure in their life. This would promote people to encourage strict “rules” of only having heterosexual marriages. However, this would equally be the case for a child being raised by a single parent.

I guess I’m confused why America cares SO much about what the ‘gays’ are doing OR even why they are referred to in that category? Why do we think that we know the answer to how children should be raised? Why are we so scared of letting people be parents? It’s probably safe to say those who oppose this lifestyle and say that gay people aren't good parents are also the people that walk away when they see a parent scream or even hit their child in public. It’s a double standard. It’s not fair or even logical to automatically assume that if a man and a women have a child together they will instantly be fantastic parents.   

xoxo

Black, White, Purple, Blue. Who Cares If They Look Like You?

As I casually scrolled the New York Times website this morning, I clicked on the Opinions page. Often times I will go through this section to see if anyone has an opinion that is similar to mine. Most times I am wrong, people usually don't have similar views as I do. Usually I'm okay with this, other times I'm so appalled and ashamed of these people. Today, I am ashamed. The Opinion article read, In Adoption, Does Race Matter?

I know, this is where people should freely be able to voice their opinions and I should accept that not everyone will see things the same way. However, I'm still shocked.

Cheerios is familiar with controversy with their last ad that sparked an incredible backlash from viewers. The last advertisement showed a bi-racial family(the same one that was featured on the Super Bowl ad).  4,871,934 views later, 76,054 thumbs up and 3,070 thumbs down, the comments section on YouTube was disabled. 

The New York Times article offers scholars and authors an opportunity to debate this “issue” on whether children should be raised by people who look like them. I’m sorry, why is this even a debate? Skin color, hair color, eye color, or anything for that matter in terms of appearance should NEVER be a box someone should have to check to justify that they would be fit parents.

Too many children are stuck in foster care, abusive homes and caught in a continuous cycle of being neglected. WHY ON EARTH would we limit a child’s ability to find a loving home simply because the adoptive parents do not look like them? I’m still very confused as to why this is even an issue, that clearly has sparked an excessive amount of controversy. No one should be told that they can’t adopt a child simply because they do not look like them.  

While I fully understand that some children may be confused about where they come from or feel like they may not "fit in," I think people should have the opportunity to show a child that race should not matter when it comes to love and family. Regardless of appearance, people are able to show compassion, and ultimately end the stereotype that someone's characteristics make them a "better person."

xoxo

True Life: I'm in a Literary Society

Have you ever been so mad at a situation where all you want to do is throw your arms in the air, or scream at the top of your lungs or completely walk away from it entirely and not look back? Well, that's exactly how I feel every time I'm faced with a new altercation, because of an organization I am apart of. Before I decided to come to IC I knew I wanted to accomplish great things. I was actively involved in high school; playing two sports and a leader in multiple organizations. My junior year alone, I was involved with 11 different activities. My hope was to carry this passion and drive on to my next chapter. Having a love for golf in high school, I decided to continue playing in college. Two cars packed and 4.5 hours later, I was at my first golf team meeting. The girls seemed nice and I was ready to get on the course. This team ended up not being my cup of tea, but I was okay with that because I accepted a coaching position with the swim team in town. I finally felt like I was engaging in my community and reaching out to the youth. But, that wasn't enough. I still wanted to be a part of something much larger.

When I came in town for a visit I met a girl who seemed to genuinely care about my interests. We exchanged numbers that day. This was 5 years ago and she still remains one of my closest friends. Through this friend I learned about literary societies. From the very beginning of my college search (I started looking in 6th grade) I knew Greek Life was on my list of needs for a school. 11 college applications later, I chose Illinois College. When rush began, I was ready and understood that if I received a bid, I was about to become a part of something larger than myself with history older than any of my family members.

Some people say I am "paying for my friends." Yeah, okay. I also payed to play athletics, which I've been a part of since I was 6 months old. Which included, but is not limited to: my swim suits (a new one every 3 months because I swam so much) leotards, dance shoes(tap, ballet, jazz, hip-hop), make-up and costumes for recitals, soccer cleats, tennis rackets, golf clubs (and obviously all the adorable, yet expensive golf clothes I HAD to have), private school for 10 years, art classes; the list goes on and on.  I also pay tuition, where I meet people and make friends. Everything you do in life, comes with a cost.

Some people say "Greek life is Stupid." - Yeah, so were my 5:45 a.m. practices and my 2-a-days in the freezing cold pool just to say I was a member of a Water Polo team that was top-8 in the state of Illinois.

Whatever you think of Greek life, chances are I don't care. But I do care how hard I've had to fight to stay a float. It's quite obvious when people try to tear you down and attempt to dis-ban your organization. Often times I find it very difficult to have pride in something that I've worked three years to be a member of, when people with "titles" only want you to go away. And then I'm faced with the sad realization that I had more freedoms in high school than I do in college.

All my frustration aside, it's hard to express to people my love for a place that has caused me so much pain. I've made friends with students who are athletes and students who aren't in any organized group. I am not tied down to one thing. However, when I say "True Life: I am in a Literary Society," it's known that you will face MANY battles. That is one thing I can leave my school saying; I was thrown every rule, regulation, insult and injury in the book; and I'm still fighting. If there's one lesson I can take away from being a member of this kind of organization, it's that I am a million times stronger than I was when I first began my undergrad career.

Thank you for not only allowing me to obtain two degrees, but for showing me that I will most likely  have to continue fighting for EVERYTHING and justify even the smallest things. Not only have you made me angry and want to walk away from everything, you've made me a fighter. For that, I thank you.

xoxo